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5th Graders Successfully Lobby Local Gov't for Sasquatch Sanctuary

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As far as pre-teen schooling goes, we all know the popularity rank of all the major classes:

  1.  Gym Class
  2. Art Class
  3. Everything Else
  4. Math

And right smack dab in the middle of “Everything Else” lies social studies, (or maybe civics in some parts of the country):  The half history/half politics class that mostly taught us about George Washington and Abraham Lincoln and the Louisiana Purchase and the Trail of Tears.

In the Pacific Northwest, however, one 5th grade class took their schoolwork out into the real world to protect a maybe real creature.

As a result of a rather unique project, a class of fifth graders in Washington State successfully lobbied their local government to declare their county a “Sasquatch protection and refuge area.” The crytpozoological civics lesson was reportedly the work of students at Lincoln Elementary School in the city of Holquiam. According to their teacher, Andrea Andrews, the youngsters were initially tasked with researching the famed cryptid and determining “if Bigfoot was real and hadn’t been discovered yet, or that it was just a big bear and people had misidentified it.” This sparked something of a healthy debate within the class with opinions on the issue largely being split down the middle.

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Upon coming to a consensus, the class put together a proposal which argued that there is evidence supporting “the notion that Sasquatch exists” and, since sightings are scant at best, it is “likely an endangered species” that needs protection. Much to the subsequent surprise of the students, when resolution 2022-037 came before the Grays Harbor County Board of Commissioners at a meeting last month, officials opted to unanimously pass the proposal and decreed that the county is now a “Sasquatch protection and refuge area.” Stressing to her students that they had “changed the world in a little way” via their Bigfoot project, Andrews hopes that they will carry the civics lesson “into the rest of their lives.”

While there may not be much evidence that the “refuge” status of Grays Harbor County was totally necessary, we have to admit that proposing legislation that created a “Sasquatch Sanctuary” looks pretty cool on a resumé.
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About the Author:
As a lifelong advocate for the dream promised us in the Constitution, Andrew West has spent his years authoring lush prose editorial dirges regarding America's fall from grace and her path back to prosperity. When West isn't railing against the offensive whims of the mainstream media or the ideological cruelty that is so rampant in the US, he spends his time seeking adventurous new food and fermented beverages, with the occasional round of golf peppered in.