Making room in your home, and in your heart, for a child who is not biologically yours is an amazing reflection of God’s grace and adoption of sinners, but it is not without its hardships and struggles.
Adopting a child with special needs can increase the tension in an already difficult process, and so many of these precious children end up without families because of what their care would entail.
When God adopted us into His kingdom, however, he didn’t hesitate for our flaws and imperfections, and the adoptive family who mirrors this finds such an immense reward.
In a heartwarming piece for Relevant Magazine, author Scarlet Hiltibidal shares her amazing experience with adopting a little girl from China with special needs and the lessons God taught her through it all.
Ya Zhu was almost four, but she couldn’t walk and wasn’t potty trained. There were concerns about her cognitive development.
Many doctors and specialists said we ought to proceed with ‘great hesitation.’ One told us not to move forward at all. They all agreed there must be something else very wrong with Ya Zhu because her delays were so significant.
But my husband and I managed to stay mostly peaceful. We didn’t know if Ya Zhu would heal and recover. We didn’t know how hard things would be. We didn’t know if she’d be a joyful child, but we decided to rename her ‘Joy.’ We hoped and prayed adopting her would give her hope and a future.
While embarking on the journey of adoption and knowing full well you are in for a challenge can surely cause a healthy degree of apprehension, Hiltibidal says she and her husband, by God’s grace, were able to proceed without an ounce of fear in their hearts.
God was leading us to Joy, and He was with us. He had come through in so many ways: checks from strangers to cover adoption fees at exactly the right time, comforting words from the Bible, people who moved our anxious hearts toward rest, doors opening and closing and freelance jobs falling out of the sky exactly as our adoption agency was asking for another payment. God was with us. He kept proving He was in the process and supporting it and leading it. We weren’t afraid.
In a moment of raw, authentic honesty, Hiltibidal reveals that it wasn’t until she actually met her new daughter that fear crept in.
We were convinced Joy would never walk, never learn, never leave diapers. I wondered if our family would ever laugh again. If we’d ever have an easy Saturday at the park. I wondered how much wheelchairs cost and what my other children would miss out on because of this decision we’d made.
But right there, in the middle of the scariest moment of the entire process, God reached down and touched Hiltibidal’s heart to remind her of one of His deepest truths.
He reminded me that I was, and so often still am, a child with special needs who doesn’t know how to rest in the love of her adoptive Parent. He reminded me that I am the little girl with broken ears and broken eyes and my hands clenched around everything I can grab, and yet He walked into this broken world so He could adopt me into His family.
Hiltibidal draws us back to Romans 8:15, which says, “For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, ‘Abba! Father!’”
Emboldened to follow the clear path God had set before her, no matter the challenges, Hiltibidal began to see His faithfulness and power in their new lives with Joy.
Joy is five now. She’s more than doubled in size since her adoption, is fluent in sign language and actually advanced in communication according to an evaluation from her school. With a hearing aid, she can hear and understand English, and after a year of physical therapy, her therapist suggested we discontinue her services because Joy no longer needs the extra help.
Life with Joy has become such an amazing blessing for her family. Not only does she enrich their lives with all the love, hugs, and learning experiences a child comes with, her special needs point the Hiltibidals to the Gospel on a daily basis.
In my life, God has used the world of special needs to make me stop depending on my life plans and my strength. Instead, He’s offered me His plan and His strength. When Joy’s special needs caused her to depend on me, I had no choice but to take my weakness to God.
I’m not strong. I’m not powerful. I’m not ‘normal.’ I’m as dependent as my special needs daughter. We are all dependent on the power of God for our next breath. Resting in that reality is what can give you and me the ability to look around and reach out and meet the needs of others, the way God reached down from Heaven to meet ours.
God has this wonderful way of structuring our lives such that we endure challenges designed specifically to draw us closer to Him and to teach us to be like Him. When those challenges involve our children, what a wonderful insight we gain into the heart of our Father in Heaven.
Join the conversation!
We have no tolerance for comments containing violence, racism, vulgarity, profanity, all caps, or discourteous behavior. Thank you for partnering with us to maintain a courteous and useful public environment where we can engage in reasonable discourse.
All It Took Was $6, A Thunderstorm, And A “God Thing” To Launch This Country Star’s Career
Did you know that every single detail in your life is a thread in an intricate tapestry woven together by the Master? Where you’re born, the friends you’ll make, who you’ll marry, the jobs you land, the ministries you serve, that’s all God’s beautiful orchestration.
He has a perfect will, and try as we might, we’re his creatures and we can’t rush Him or outrun Him. It’s not our time to shine until God says so.
That’s the incredible lesson fledgling country star Russell Dickerson had to learn the hard way.
Dickerson, a Belmont University grad, had tried to make waves in the country music scene for years. He’d landed a record deal way back in 2010, but it had “definitely been a slow journey,” he shared with Fox News, describing the trials he went through trying to “get big” before it was truly his time.
“We had no money, no budget, no nothing and we had been turned down, turned down, turned down,” the singer recalled.
“The biggest first step was our music video [that] my wife shot,” Dickerson said, retelling the frustrated moments that led up to his big break.
Dickerson and his wife, Kailey, finally had enough and decided to try their hand at recording a music video: “We’re like, alright, we’re going to do this on our own.”
“So we shot this music video for ‘Yours’ and if you watch it on YouTube,” the singer explains, “it’s just me walking down a road and my wife is in my SUV just shooting out of the back and it just starts raining and there’s lightning everywhere.”
What might of seemed like the end result of years of failure and frustration to the Dickersons was really just God’s perfect timing, all the way down to the thunderstorm that gave the video such an exciting vibe.
“It was this God moment, totally,” he said.
God wasn’t done with the Dickersons yet, though. Not long after the video, which cost just six dollars to film (possibly the gas for the SUV?), an industry exec reached out to Dickerson and the following events just “snowballed into this perfect storm” that finally gave his career wings.
Ultimately, Dickerson says, if God gave him this dream, God was going to be the one to make it a reality.
“I feel like God’s given me this dream of being on stage and writing a song, even of getting a tour bus…All of these dreams he put into my mind and into my heart are finally coming to fruition.”
The good, the bad, the frustrating, the hopeless, the glorious, every part of our lives is in God’s hands, and we don’t believe in a God who can fail. The next time you find yourself, like Dickerson, struggling against the waves, stop, turn to God, and watch His perfect timing unfold.
Remember This Incredible Truth The Next Time You Pray For Your Children
When we pray for our kids, let us remember this truth and pray accordingly.
In an encouraging opinion piece for Fox News, author Jeannie Cunnion shared how God reminded her of something incredible: our lives, and our children, are not truly our own.
“When praying for my kids, I have always used the words, ‘my boys’ or ‘my sons,’” Cunnion says. “There is, of course, nothing wrong with praying this way. God entrusted four boys to my husband and me to raise to His glory.”
One night, however, Cunnion recalls how a moment of crying out to God when she was helpless to guide one of her sons through a “painful hardship.”
It’s then that Cunnion says she “felt the Holy Spirit remind me that these boys are first and foremost sons of God. That as much as I love them and long for them, they were “perfectly and wonderfully” made by God (Psalm 139), they belong to God, and God’s love and desire for them is infinitely more profound and pure than even mine.”
That incredible realization began to totally transform the way Cunnion prayed for her son through his trial. “In light of this truth,” she explained, “I began to pray ‘Your sons,’ rather than ‘my sons.’”
This choice of words might seem simple and insignificant, but for Cunnion it guided her to pray while remembering the truth “that God is their all-knowing, all-powerful Father, and because God is sovereign and full of grace, He can be trusted with the children He has entrusted to me.”
Our children won’t be precious little babies forever, and believe it or not, they won’t always be as easy to redirect back to God when they stumble. Sooner or later, they will experience pain, temptation, and their sinful nature will develop as they age.
This is when it’s the most crucial to remember that they belong, ultimately, to God, Cunnion says. “…When their feelings get hurt or their hearts get broken, when they struggle with substance abuse or eating disorders, when they make wrong choices, or when they simply don’t feel lovable or valuable. When our hearts break for our kids and we long to right every wrong in their lives, we have to remember they have a sovereign and good heavenly Father.”
“Then we are free to pray,” she continues, “‘Lord, they are yours. They belong to you.’”
It might seem scary, for sure, but there is immense freedom in realizing that you do not control the grand scheme of your life or your child’s life. God does. Praying as though you have an ounce of control over these things puts you forever at odds with God rather than in the safest place of all: squarely in the center of His perfect will.
“To say that God is sovereign is not to say that our children don’t have free will,” Cunnion explains. “Indeed, God has given all of us free will. We are all responsible for the choices we make, and our choices matter. However, God is not limited by our choices. He is continually working everything together ‘for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them’ (Romans 8:28).”
Parents, if God left even the best parent in the world in total control of the lives of their children, you can’t begin to imagine how quickly they’d faceplant and fail. Just like with our very salvation, if it were based on our own strength and goodness, we’d be left with a pile of filthy rags.
Why struggle this way? Why not straighten out your mind and align it with God’s will? God gives us a will, a mind, and a ministry, He didn’t design us to be robots. He didn’t design us to struggle through the pain of life, and of parenting, alone either.
“Remembering our good Father’s sovereignty relieves so much of the pressure we experience in motherhood,” Cunnion says. “It’s not all up to you, and it’s not all up to me – and praise Him for that!”
If it were up to us to raise our children perfectly and see to it that they arrive on Heaven’s doorstep, you can bet we’d fail again and again. God didn’t set it up that way. God orders our steps and the steps of our children. When we pray for our kids, let us remember that truth and pray accordingly.
BOMBSHELL: Hate Crime Hoaxer Smollett Gave ‘False Information’ to Cops In 2007
He has a history of lying...
NEVER FORGET: Bernie Was Asked to Leave Hippie Commune for Refusing to Work
Nikki Haley Unloads Both Barrels On Smollett, Then Lights Up MSM for Getting Played
Game over. Haley wins.
WATCH: Voters Send Bernie Message He Won’t Forget HOURS After Making 2020 Bid
Sorry not sorry!
Trump Delivers Another BRUTAL Blow to Obama’s Legacy, Saves Americans $450 Billion
Getting things done!
Best of the Week
News5 days ago
Amazon Sucker Punches AOC on Their Way Out of NYC
News3 days ago
AOC May Have Committed ‘Major Ethics Violation’ After Startling Discovery Uncovered
Opinion5 days ago
Jim Acosta Just Had a Very Rough Afternoon in The Rose Garden
News4 days ago
Chicago Police Cite NEW EVIDENCE, Release Nigerian Brothers In Jussie Smollett Case
News6 days ago
New Mexico Creates ‘Sanctuary’ of Their Own, and Dems are FURIOUS
News4 days ago
IT BEGINS: Dems Launch Investigation Hours After Trump Declares Border Emergency
News3 days ago
INSTANT CLASSIC: Pelosi Wishes A ‘Happy Thanksgiving’ — On Valentine’s Day (Watch)
News6 days ago
NBC News Preparing Viewers to Be Disappointed in Mueller Report
News6 days ago
New Poll Shows Bad News for California’s Liberal Majority
News4 days ago
WATCH: Pelosi’s Epic Brain Freeze – Slurs Words, Holds Up Wrong Number of Fingers
News5 days ago
Kamala Campaign Reports Dire Finances Just Weeks into Race
Entertainment5 days ago
Hollywood Steps Up To Defend Antisemitic Democrat