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Harrowing Tale of Week-Long Bear Attack is a Hoax, Say Investigators

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It was only a few days ago that the world became familiar with a truly stupendous tale out of America’s last frontier.

A man, stranded at a remote cabin in the Alaskan bush, was being haunted and hunted every night by a vicious bear, after being mauled ever so slightly on his first day on site.  His rescuers arrived after a week of these nightly attacks, and only after the stranded man was able to create a plea for help large enough to be seen by the air.

The only issue with the story is that the whole thing appears to be made up, at least according to local researchers. 

While the story went viral worldwide and more details came to light about the incident, some community members began to express concerns and doubt about the veracity of the tale.

The cabin [Richard] Jessee took refuge in, as it turns out, was not his. It belonged to a fellow miner, though Jessee’s cabin sat only a few yards away.

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“We went out there to the cabin, but we couldn’t find a bear track within 500 feet of the place, but it should have been all torn up, according to his story,” said one anonymous source known to the Nugget. “There’s no hair, no tracks, no scat, nothing.”

And also…

The Coast Guard crew delivered him to an ambulance in Nome, which took him to Norton Sound Health Regional hospital.

“We were told to get a man who had been mauled by a bear,” said Jim West Jr., the Nome Volunteer Fire and Ambulance chief. “He walked off the helicopter and walked into the ambulance. He had no animal bites and wasn’t bleeding.”

Local police do admit that the area is known for its bear population, however, and the traumatized Jessee is sticking to his story, telling local reporters that he hasn’t been that scared in a long, long time.

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About the Author:
As a lifelong advocate for the dream promised us in the Constitution, Andrew West has spent his years authoring lush prose editorial dirges regarding America's fall from grace and her path back to prosperity. When West isn't railing against the offensive whims of the mainstream media or the ideological cruelty that is so rampant in the US, he spends his time seeking adventurous new food and fermented beverages, with the occasional round of golf peppered in.




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