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Mysterious Napkin Tucked in Car Door Handle Poisons Texas Woman

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There are all sort of ne’er-do-wells in today’s society.  Miscreants as far as the eye can see, with evil lurking in corners that we never even knew existed.  The existential dread of a world on figurative fire has ever more of us turning to a life of pure and abject chaos, unafraid of the consequences and hopeless about the future.

As the world devolves, so too does society.  And in this day and age, we can’t be too careful about anything.

Proving this point is a scary bit of news out of Texas, where a woman found herself poisoned by a napkin that was stuffed under her car door handle.

Erin Mims joined her husband at a Houston-area restaurant to celebrate her birthday last Tuesday afternoon. As she left the restaurant she noticed someone stuck a napkin in the door handle on the passenger side of her car, Fox 26 Houston’s Sherman Desselle reported.

She pulled the napkin out of the door and opened it to get in the car. Once inside she asked her husband if he stuck the napkin in the door — he said no.

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Mims decided to go back into the restaurant and wash her hands.

Then things took a scary turn.

A few minutes later, she began to feel a tingling sensation in her arm.

“Maybe five minutes, my whole arm started tingling and feeling numb. I couldn’t breathe,” Mims told the Fox 26 reporter. “I started getting hot flashes, my chest was hurting, my heart was beating really fast.”
Mim’s husband quickly took her to a hospital where doctors raced to determine what substance had been used to create the numbness and other symptoms her body experienced. Her vital signs jumped all over the place, she explained.

The doctors determined that Mims had been poisoned, but that not enough of the substance had entered her bloodstream to make a conclusive identification.

Doctors believe that the poisoning may have been an attempt to kidnap Mims, adding a terrifying new angle to the story.

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About the Author:
As a lifelong advocate for the dream promised us in the Constitution, Andrew West has spent his years authoring lush prose editorial dirges regarding America's fall from grace and her path back to prosperity. When West isn't railing against the offensive whims of the mainstream media or the ideological cruelty that is so rampant in the US, he spends his time seeking adventurous new food and fermented beverages, with the occasional round of golf peppered in.